As I can feel the birthing of our baby draw closer, I have been contemplating how I can best serve myself, this little one and our family as I move through this transition and journey into mamahood.

I have decided to deactivate my Facebook account for now.

I have been feeling unsatisfied with the connections I have through social media for a while now and feeling a deep desire to create and foster more intimate connections. I would love to connect more with people in my local area as well as deepen the connections I have with my dear friends. I do not feel Facebook offers me a platform for this. I am often left feeling deflated, even alone. 

I notice how I know so much about what is going on in someone’s life but I rarely ever actually connect with them – face to face, skin to skin, person to person, heart to heart. I feel sad about this. It’s not what I had imagined the forms of my relating to be.

I am also looking to reduce screen time as I do not want our child to create a connection with a screen. I know how addictive this can be for us as adults so, when I consider the impact of screen time on a child, I notice concern.

I realise so much that the intimacy, support and nourishment that I would like our child to receive is much of what I need to give to myself. I need to live by my own inner integrity and this, in and of itself, can offer (I hope) clear and loving modelling for our child, as well as giving them permission to fully be who they are. 

I feel a bit afraid of the “connections” I may lose in stepping away from social media. I have spent most of my adult life living abroad and have created connections with people who live far from my home base. I love seeing how you all are and what you are up to. I hold so many of you in my heart and the usual feelings of grief and fear upon letting go come up.

However, I do also feel, that if we are to truly connect we will find other ways of doing so that are more gratifying, more nourishing, more authentic. I hear the voices in my head about losing touch with people, events and work if I step away… and, yet, it feels like the right thing to do, especially now. 

I am not saying this will be forever, nor am I attempting to reduce the value of social media for anyone. This is simply what is true for me, right now.

When I begin facilitating again, I may choose to step back in. I may not. Like any relationship that doesn’t feel fulfilling and can’t be resolved through direct contact, I am needing to take space from my relationship with social media, either to reform it or to let it go. 

So, how will I do this? Part of me feels awkward that breaking away from facebook feels a bit like the ending of a relationship. I cringe a bit at that!! It is a relationship, albeit a non-human one that involves humans!! And, in a way, the truth is some connections will dissolve away.

Well, I’d like to do this consciously, gradually. 

My plan is to wait until after I have given birth. I hope to post a photograph and a fare well message before I go, with this blog as pre-notice of my departure. This gives anyone time to be in touch if you wish to. So, this gives us about a month more Facebook contact time, depending on when the baby is born. It may be a good idea to get in the habit of contacting me via email as oppose to Facebook. 

Ways to stay in touch:

• Professional wise (if you have been coming to classes or want to keep up to date about any offerings I may be making or blog musings): Please subscribe to my mailing list and follow my blog (there is an option to do this on my website in the right hand column of the pages). I will continue to blog from time to time (don’t expect to hear from me for a wee while after our little one is born!!). This way you can stay updated about anything I may offer at a professional level.
• I will be offering one-to-one skype sessions after about 6 months – 1 year, depending on the needs of our baby so do stay tuned about those. 
• I will offer workshops in Scotland when I come to visit, likely in about a year, perhaps next summer.

• Personal Connections (friends, family): I will be looking to reduce the amount of time I am on a screen, as well as my mobile phone. We have a landline! Please text or email me and I will share my number with you and would love to stay in touch! It may be great to skype sometimes too. Likely for the first part of our baby’s life, our land line is best! I would LOVE to stay connected so if you don’t have my details please contact me so our friendship can continue and deepen.

I thank you all so much for your support and understanding and I look forward to the ways our relationships evolve, whether professional or personal.

I am also looking forward to having a bit more space in my life, in my body and out of my head; time to spend connecting with the natural world and sharing this with our baby; quality time in the company of people; quiet times; and times to celebrate in community. Generally slowing down, rooting in and connecting out in more authentic ways.

SO many blessings to you all and thank you for being part of this journey! All well wishes to those of you who I may not meet again. You have all touched me in some way.